Who would watch 'Clash of the Titans (2010)'?

Contains minor spoilers for The Odyssey.

Oscar and Carl chat about the 2010 remake of Clash of the Titans, starring Sam Worthington and Liam Neeson. Together, they discuss the terrible lighting, the acting, and the film’s many odd creative choices. They also ask whether this is the worst Ralph Fiennes has ever been, along with the ultimate question: Who would watch this?

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

My name is Oscar. My name is Carl. And this is Who Would Watch This? Welcome to who would watch the podcast.

SPEAKER_01 0:04

We watch a film, chapter the film, and try and figure out who to watch this. Today we're talking about Clash of the Titans, the 2006 version? 2010 one.

SPEAKER_00 0:12

2010 one. Not the 1982 one. We're not coming for you yet, wink wink.

SPEAKER_01 0:18

Um, which currently has a 5.8 on IVB, a 27% on Rotten Tomatoes, and a 2.5 on Letterboxd.

SPEAKER_00 0:24

Oscar, what's the plot? I mean, if you guys know Greek mythology, you already know this one, but I'll give you the scoop. Perseus, a demigod and son of Zeus, battles the minions of Hades and the underworld in order to stop them from conquering Olympus and Earth.

SPEAKER_01 0:37

Was pretty frustrated to find out this isn't a a Greek tale. It's just a bunch of shit shoved into a bucket.

SPEAKER_00 0:45

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. They got they were like, we like that, but we're not gonna take that. We'll take that, we won't do that.

SPEAKER_01 0:50

Which is funny because as a kid, I was like, oh, I do love all of these aspects.

SPEAKER_00 0:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:56

They they took all my favorite ones and chucked them into bucket.

SPEAKER_00 1:00

Yeah, as a child, like, wow, you c you cut the fat of Greek mythology.

SPEAKER_01 1:03

All the time people would be like, well, Jason and the Argonauts is my favorite, or Hercules is my favorite, and I was like, nah, Clash of the Titans, that's the best one. They shmushed them in a big ball.

SPEAKER_00 1:14

It's like every colour of Play Doh, smushed into a nice big brown, and he just ate that. He just ate that real good stuff.

SPEAKER_01 1:19

Um, but yeah, that's what I that's what I discovered this week. But that's not what we need to talk about. We actually need to talk about last week. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:27

When we hadn't seen the film, we tried to figure out who would watch this. That's the premise. That's what we're gonna go back to. Carl, roll the tape. Let's let's go back there. Bam. Bam. Carl, it is a couple of days after we've both watched the Odyssey. That's right. Last week, a bit more like a couple of days. That's right. We kind of were like, hey, we should do versus month, and then the Odyssey came out, went, why don't we do Greek Greek mythology?

SPEAKER_01 1:56

Sometimes, sometimes we meet on uh a Monday, and then we go and record on a Wednesday, and uh that means the last week was Monday. Yeah, and that's what's happening. That's what's happening, that's what's happening.

SPEAKER_00 2:06

Pretty brave. Uh I do feel like we've made a good pivot. It was a pretty obvious one because any everybody's, it seems like, is going back and watching all Greek mythology uh stuff.

SPEAKER_01 2:16

Yeah, we can I'll happily talk about it after we've seen Clash of the Titans, but I the next day after I saw the Odyssey, I immediately watched Troy. And so I was like, Is Troy meant to be good? It's the one it's quite expensive looking. Yeah, Nolan was meant to do Troy. So I think I did hear that, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:34

So it is funny. They were like, go make insomnia, you freaks. We got Robin Williams up there in Alaska or something.

SPEAKER_01 2:41

It's kind of funny how I think they gave him Batman Begins as an apology because he got so far into the production of Troy, and then they gave it back to the original director when his other project fell through. Yeah. So funny how that all works out, huh? Serendipity, huh? Yeah. Uh no, but Nolan made the much better film of the two.

SPEAKER_00 3:00

Or was the better horse, you know. A lot of people have been questioning the horsies.

SPEAKER_01 3:03

I look, I think the obvious I think the one in the Odyssey is like super stylish and beautiful, and then the look, there's no, there's no other way around it except for in in Troy, it is Sean Bean plays um Odysseus, and he's next to a fire, and a guy's carving a horse for his son, and is like, I'm gonna give this to him as a gift. And Sean Bean's eyes go cut to that made the horse.

SPEAKER_00 3:31

Which is like 2001 space, odyssey, it's like the bone been thrown up, but it's a little horsey, and then it becomes a big horsey. It's the best cut in cinema they've been calling it.

SPEAKER_01 3:40

As soon as that happened, I was like, this isn't a good film. This is I don't know what people are on about. This is not, this is not a good film.

SPEAKER_00 3:47

Carl, but we thought let's start with a bit of Greek mythology. I was saying Percy. You said Clash of the Titans is actually the one to go for. Um, what or you want to do Percy Jackson? I feel like it's in the air. Haven't we done Percy Jackson? I don't know. I don't think we have. I don't think we've done Seer Monsters, even though we've been begging. We haven't done Seer Monsters. We definitely did the first one. I don't think we've done the first one.

SPEAKER_01 4:07

No, I kind of watched that of my own accord recently.

SPEAKER_00 4:10

We all no, you did.

SPEAKER_01 4:12

Did I? Yeah. I think we did it. No, we definitely didn't do it. I think we definitely did it.

SPEAKER_00 4:17

We have not done Percy Jackson. I'm like 90% sure. No, we've actually no memory's back. No, we've done it. We've definitely done it. We've definitely done it. We have not done Percy Jackson. Have we? I think we discussed doing Sea of Monsters. I don't think we have. I think you watched it for the show. You're comparing it. Oh, maybe. No. And then you watched the C we watched Sea of Monsters like a couple of years ago as a bit. How do you how do you search your own podcast?

SPEAKER_01 4:44

Is that a thing?

SPEAKER_00 4:45

I think so.

SPEAKER_01 4:47

Can we cut to that little picture of the kitten that's like hanging there? I reckon we've done it.

SPEAKER_00 4:53

I definitely don't think we've done it. I would have remembered. Because I would have been uh I would have had some positive things to say about Grover.

SPEAKER_01 5:02

Surely not.

SPEAKER_00 5:05

We've not done it. I've just seen it on Spotify. Teared up. I really just voluntarily watched it? Yeah, you definitely did. Really? Yeah. It doesn't sound sound like you. I mean it definitely does sound like you. It couldn't be more you. It couldn't be more you than you watch some nonsense for some nonsense.

SPEAKER_01 5:24

Okay, so just the caveat. I saw Clash of the Tide twice in the cinemas. So it's you're totally you're on the money. You're absolutely on the money. Hang on, hang on. I accidentally wrote in Pervy Jackson. This is good, this is good. This is great stuff. People say we waste time on this podcast.

SPEAKER_00 5:48

I think you watched it when the show was coming out because you were like, let me compare it. And then I feel like you almost teed up Sea of Monsters, and you told me you almost teed up Sea of Monsters. I said, don't do that. It's a bad film. He went, I don't think I like this first film. I went, of course you didn't.

SPEAKER_01 6:03

You've given it one and a half stars.

SPEAKER_00 6:05

I don't like I don't like that.

SPEAKER_01 6:06

No, but I think you I we must have done it for the podcast. How do you see when you reviewed it? I had to do it. I swear to fuck we don't have it.

SPEAKER_00 6:13

We're definitely not. And I I get the the essence of wanting to say we have, but I just don't think we have. Really? Yeah. No, but now you say it. I don't know. Anyway. Can we go into the archives? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I've looked on Spotify. We don't have it. Look, look up any think of an episode.

SPEAKER_01 6:34

Did we do it and not release the episode?

SPEAKER_00 6:37

No, I don't think so. I think I think we have we've but we we may have watched it together as a group and maybe watched some of the scenes. I believe the casino scene maybe and put on our YouTube. Perhaps.

SPEAKER_01 6:49

That's a very good scene.

SPEAKER_00 6:50

Yeah, it's a great scene. It's a great scene. I remember pretty well.

SPEAKER_01 6:55

Oh, you know what? I don't think I finished it. I think I what I think I put on the beginning. Yeah. I think you know what I did? I think I watched the movie to see how far the first episode of Percy Jackson got in.

SPEAKER_00 7:06

But I didn't I didn't finish it. That first episode, I think, only gets up to like the uh museum. Kind of like the the the the the snake scene in Harry Potter. That kind of uh emotional arc in Harry Potter put that on a Percy Jackson, first episode of the Percy Jackson.

SPEAKER_01 7:20

Sort of funny because I don't think either of them worked. No Percy Jackson's yet to have its moment.

SPEAKER_00 7:25

Yes. And it won't. It's uh it simply won't. You know what's a shame. I remember that fourth book being great, but what is that what good's that, you know?

SPEAKER_01 7:32

It's a real shame because as soon as the Odyssey ended, I've just thrown myself into Greek mythology in a way that like I watched a four-hour breakdown of every god the other day on YouTube. It was unreal.

SPEAKER_00 7:43

How good is that?

SPEAKER_01 7:44

And then just a whole breakdown of the Iliad. I just I'm loving it. I'm loving it, which is why we're here.

SPEAKER_00 7:49

We're talking about why we're doing Greek mythology month. It's even got GMM. GMM month. Oh, we're doing a whole month of this? I mean, we'll figure it all out. I mean, at the moment we've got Clash of the Titans. There's Wrath next week, baby. We could always do Wrath. Carl, quickly, Clash of Titans, why and who?

SPEAKER_01 8:05

Um, I saw this movie in 3D in cinemas in Canberra.

SPEAKER_00 8:10

You didn't remember what year it was, and it was 2010? Of course it was a 3D yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:14

Um, yeah, so I've ex- I from memory, it was a very dark film, it was really hard to see stuff, and I did I don't think I saw it twice in cinema. Yeah, I feel like maybe I went with friends from height like again afterwards. Definitely saw it on my own the first time.

SPEAKER_00 8:31

You matineed and then did it with friends.

SPEAKER_01 8:34

Vaguely remember missing the beginning. My dad was got lost in Canberra because we're country folk. And that's the big city. Yeah, and I got one big roundabout. Yeah, and dad was like, I hope you're here in an hour and a half, otherwise, I don't know how we'll find you.

SPEAKER_00 8:50

After another loop of the big roundabouts, I'll try and pick you up on another way, but it'll be another three hours.

SPEAKER_01 8:56

I was like, what are you gonna do with your time?

SPEAKER_00 8:57

And he was like, I don't think there's anything to do with looking around the camera street, I get buy some fireworks or a whore, but that's about it, really.

SPEAKER_01 9:06

I know, and uh, that's also really telling because he refused to see the film with me. And my dad has watched a lot of movies with me, but the fact he was like, I wanna I don't want to clash the Titans, I want to chill in Canberra goes to tell you how bad that's a that's a damning review.

SPEAKER_00 9:20

That's a pretty damning review.

SPEAKER_01 9:21

You must have seen the actual reviews and been like, that's not for you you're a kid, you're like, whatever. Uh but yeah, I that's that's my memory of it. And then yeah, I owned it on DVD, and then yeah, I bought the Blu-ray.

SPEAKER_00 9:33

But but I was wondering how his film made half a billion dollars. A lot of it's big. And I have no cultural moment. I guess you just these country bumpkins been just lurping up huge times.

SPEAKER_01 9:45

Said hand on heart, how many times have I seen Clash of the Titans? 11. Eleven times, Oscar.

SPEAKER_00 9:52

This podcast is I I feel like sometimes, like, you know, we both like films, we're pretty equally. I don't know where your time goes, you know. I don't know where what time do you have. And then I can't reflect on what my time's being used for. And it's and I feel like we don't get to reveal it, but it's a lot of just bad YouTube videos, which is so it's not anything, if anything you've got to clean, like you remember, I couldn't remember what I've been told. Yeah, you know.

SPEAKER_01 10:11

What's great is when I reach Heaven's door, they're gonna be like, Are you aware you wasted a lot of time on earth? And I'm gonna go, yeah. Yeah, yeah, I'm aware. I have an app to prove it. Yeah, yeah, tell you how many days I've spent watching it's like Strava, but for useless shit. Anyway, you got Clash of the Titans back there? It's not without me. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:35

Carl Hood watched Clash of the Titans, other than Eager Boys.

SPEAKER_01 10:39

Look, it's gotta be Sam Worthington fans, because I think also at the time I was all right. They were eating well in 3D.

SPEAKER_00 10:45

They were getting a lot. If you like Sam Worthington uh in a 3D space, wow, we were you eating well.

SPEAKER_01 10:50

Because it was this is the next year, right? Yeah, like this is an Avatar came out in December. Yeah, and this was an early release, I think. And so this just happened to be the next thing. I wonder how much spillover it got. Yeah. Being like, oh, well, that guy is always in a big film with good 3D. He wouldn't steer us wrong.

SPEAKER_00 11:07

I reckon that easily would have covered a hundred million dollars. For sure. Oh my god. No one said that sentence ever again. The turn of the 2010s, it ended there.

SPEAKER_01 11:18

He must have done this and been like, alright, I'm ready for Avatar 2. And James Cameron was like, it's gonna be a minute. It's gonna be a hot minute. It's gonna be a hot minute. Just stay relevant. He's like, okay, well, I've booked my next film, Man on a Ledge. James Cameron said, You've gotta pick something else. You've gotta pick up. Otherwise, you'll be on a ledge. No, no, no.

SPEAKER_00 11:39

Stay strong, same. Uh Sam Wormington, huh? Uh yeah, so I think we both agree. Sam Wilmington, big fan. I'm contemplating we do Sam Worthington month.

SPEAKER_01 11:46

That's not great. Because we could do Wrath of the Titans next and then Man on a Ledge.

SPEAKER_00 11:50

I like it. We just keep trying to push back the Greek stuff, and then we're just like, no, it's a Sam Wilmington month.

SPEAKER_01 11:54

And then we go straight into Sea of Monsters because I'm I guarantee you we've done Lightning Thief before.

SPEAKER_00 11:59

I would love to work backwards. I feel like we should watch the whole show, Sea of Monsters, and then maybe just leave Percy Jackson in the dust. It'd be good. It'd be good. Uh Oscar, what do you know of Clash of the Titans? I literally know nothing other than the poster. It reminds me of the poster of the film 10,000 BC. I feel like those both films came out in vaguely the same time. I remember them so panned. Both panned. Both I wanted to see them, and both I just I think as a child I went, I'll get around to it. And I just didn't. Um so yeah, I've got no understanding of what this film was. I couldn't believe it wasn't a bomb. That's what's really surprised me the most. It's really shock shocked me, it made so much money. Yeah, I'm excited to see. It's nice original film and still that isn't it, you know, it's nice, it's nice. So I guess I guess if you like film, period, you're gonna like this one. Yeah. I think that's pretty much it.

SPEAKER_01 12:48

I think the I also had the original on VCR, and I quite liked that as a kid. So I think I remake it. I was really excited about them doing it again. So and I loved Greek mythology as a kid. Like I got married in Greece. Like, I love Greek mythology. Oh yeah, oh yeah. So I I that's me, you know. Um, so yeah, I'm excited to see what it's like, and I'm sure in between it all, maybe we'll bring up a little bit of our our Odyssey experience, you know, just to see, hey, hey, how do they compare? How do they compare Carl's Clash of the Titans? Uh absolute fucking garbage. Absolute, absolute garbage. This is one of the most garbage movies I've ever seen in my life. I hated this experience. I thought this was terrible top to bottom.

SPEAKER_00 13:39

I saw you've given it a two already on Letterboxd. Too high. I was pretty underwhelmed. However, I was going in, kind of expecting nothing, and I kind of got some action sequences and just some gen. What what has made you so revolted at the Clash of the Time?

SPEAKER_01 13:54

It's simply just scene after scene.

SPEAKER_00 13:58

Many films are just of like there is I'll give I'll give you this bit of nonsense about scorpion shit. I couldn't believe 20 minutes of the film dedicated to scorpion.

SPEAKER_01 14:07

Oh my god, I couldn't believe it either. Like, where did all these scorpions come from? And then that guy goes, we're gonna rant them. But oh god, somebody definitely wrote Dune.

SPEAKER_00 14:19

This film is they're like, we're doing Greek mythology, and they're like, oh, we don't even have any confidence in that. Do Star Wars and Dune and all those ones. We just don't do Greek mythology.

SPEAKER_01 14:30

It's an absolute mess. It's also it's a real shame too, because I think there's some really great uh makeup and practical stuff in the movie.

SPEAKER_00 14:38

I couldn't believe some of the practical stuff. I mean, and here's us gonna be blending the Odyssey stuff. I mean, I feel like they nailed those three witches, huh? Well, I thought they would have if they weren't so brightly lit. I looked at the exact same thing. I was like, wow, what terrific makeup. And then someone some for some reason turns the kitchen light on and goes, oh god. And it's great makeup, but it is well lit. So I go, those are just three little people in horrible makeup.

SPEAKER_01 15:04

They had overhead white lighting on. It was bizarre, it was like you're at the doctor's office. Yeah. Yet we were in a cave.

SPEAKER_00 15:12

I couldn't Which is so it's so practical. It was so many games. It's so great.

SPEAKER_01 15:16

So much good practical makeup, and all of it looks like it's a soap opera and thus discounts into a Halloween costume.

SPEAKER_00 15:22

It's kind of terrific. Should we get into it? We open with uh the little gist about the Titans and how they became a before the Greek gods.

SPEAKER_01 15:30

So I'll I'll say something really quickly about uh the Odyssey and uh Troy and this film. Yeah. Uh which is this movie begins with a shit ton of exposition. Yeah. Troy began with maybe eight pages of text on a screen. That's a good story. It just kept going. It was like reading half a novel before the movie began. And I think a real criticism is Troy set in what is Troy?

SPEAKER_00 15:58

What's Troy? Troy's the Iliad, which is the Iliad guy. That's just the Iliad. Um wasn't it nice that we've watched this? You've watched Troy, and now you've watched Odyssey. So you really have got the whole narrative.

SPEAKER_01 16:09

Yeah, I've got a good fun little narrative of it all. And I think the Odyssey starts with so much happening, and it's hard to get your bearings, and it's also a bit slow. But I really respect the Odyssey for not doing writing on a screen for pages and pages.

SPEAKER_00 16:26

They pretty much go one word, go, it's magic or some shit. Shut up and watch, okay? You'll get settled in 30 minutes once you figure out what the Zeus code is.

SPEAKER_01 16:38

Um, so I was when this began and it was just so much exposition, all of it wrong as well, after consuming a lot of creeped media.

SPEAKER_00 16:48

Look, they're just as like, look, the Titans were there, then somebody mate got the Kraken, which is the big squid thing. And then Zeus and Hades kissed. They fondled a little, but then they just got a bit messy, and then Hades' like, I'm taking the Kraken back home, and Zeus is like, uh-uh, that guy's dead. And then that's just where we are. And then also uh we wake up and there's a baby in the chest.

SPEAKER_01 17:10

Yeah, it's so much as well, because then the baby in the chest grows up to be a little boy who has a scene, and then this entire family's killed in the next scene. It's all useless. Pete Pothelwaite uh saves him on a beach, wasn't that bad? I thought he was really good in it. He was really good. I thought he unfortunately maybe would have been is one of the better actors in the whole movie. He's killed so quickly.

SPEAKER_00 17:30

It's really upsetting. He's just a little fisherman man, he has this scene where he's like, I saved a boy, he's like, Let me raise him, and then he kind of just unceremoniously is killed. It's quite upsetting.

SPEAKER_01 17:39

He legitimately looks like the human version of Hercules uh like raising dad in the Disney cartoon.

SPEAKER_00 17:47

He's exactly like I don't know what it is, but his head is like a circle, and his like I I know his neck isn't a tiny stick, Pete's is, but in the com he represents that. Wow. Oh, I feel he had kindness behind the eyes.

SPEAKER_01 18:00

He absolutely did. I have never fallen in love with the character so quickly. To have him ripped out of the movie was a bad omen. The fact so much happens so quickly and yet none of it really matters, yeah, is like a lot of the beginning of it could still even be in the exposition. If you're still doing exposition, just go for it.

SPEAKER_00 18:18

At that point, just do the whole story until you get to like modern day and be like, and now we're in Greece. This could have been 50. The financial crisis 2008, oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 18:28

But I really liked because the the boy's sitting there, uh and he says, uh Perseus says to his dad, You're about to have another kid. How am I meant to know you're gonna you're gonna love me as much? And he says, I love every kid. Doesn't matter. But you I'm led to believe that that sister is going to be an important part of the film. Yeah. And they're all killed in the next scene. Yeah. So it's just pointless. They've just gone, what's the quickest way we can just have the dad say I love you to this boy? Yeah. Because we're not setting them up by the time they're ripped away from him.

SPEAKER_00 19:03

Poor. It is really poor, and then I feel like it's a bit of a blur. I feel like Sam Wilmington is the age he is now playing like, but pa, he's like, you maybe 15. Yeah. You wash washes ashore, and then he's taken by the Greek gods, like, we're going, we're going to the castle. Shut up. Just get up there. We got a thing to do. Keep going until we get this Greek mythology shit bullshit going.

SPEAKER_01 19:25

Feels like an editor actually saw that they'd maybe shot more and was and just thought, this is fucking, this is bad. Yeah. Just get to get to Hades. Yeah, get to Hades. Get to something happening. Get to get to all the Hades scenes. And then going, are there any are there any takes where Ralph Fines isn't whispering? Are there any? Have we got any? He only did that the whole time.

SPEAKER_00 19:46

Now, what now is any where Ralph Fines is not dressed and looking like that? That'd be great. No. Is that his own eyeliner? Who's edited him to look like a bird when he arrives plate? He looks like a butterfly. I thought he looked insane and I did shriek, because this might be probably the worst performance I've ever seen. It's absolutely the worst performance I've ever seen. I really didn't think you could. But was this 2010? This is like mid Harry Potter.

SPEAKER_01 20:12

Like he's kind of He's so clearly been throwing a shit ton of money because what he's doing on Harry Potter's working really well. Then they've gone, well, that's a similar thing, so you could just do it. It's the same with Liam Neeson's sort of hot-off taken. Yeah. They're like, well, you can do that. Everybody I was shocked at how stacked this cast was.

SPEAKER_00 20:28

Nicholas Holt is the most bronze man I've ever seen in my life in a fan. He's a crazy hair, but I think he also just had like skin. Like I guess it's funny. Is there the other girl from skins in this as well? Ooh, maybe. I can't remember. Yes. It looked like I thought it looked like was that not Effie?

SPEAKER_01 20:46

That was not Effie. Oh, okay. I thought it was Effie. My mistake. I withdraw my I withdraw what I've seen.

SPEAKER_00 20:50

It's embarrassing. But it's got Mads Mickelson. Mads Mickelson. That is crazy, yeah, crazy. You got the guy from Game of Thrones. A lot of Game of Thrones characters are just sort of in the background. I think they were just sort of circling until HBO like will take you all as a package deal. They're like, can we get your sets as well? Just get you you've fronted a lot of the cost already. Just chuck it in there. Just fuck it. It's fine. Um yeah, we do get introduced to, and I again I thought this would even matter, but we've got like the king and queen. They're like, hey, fuck the same. Fuck the gods. This is my daughter. She's not married yet. Uh-oh, Sam Wormington. Don't worry, it doesn't come back.

SPEAKER_01 21:26

And yeah, and the mom, the mom is the mum says, and she's a hottie. She's the hottest girl in the kingdom. What are you gonna fucking do about that, huh? Yeah. Everyone. Yeah. Hades goes, you're dead. You're dead. The power that I couldn't believe Hades has was to have people stop a little bit. The daughter comes out and he goes, whoop. And she's like, ah, keeps walking forward. He then does this to Zeus later in the movie, and Zeus is like, ah, no, keep walking forward.

SPEAKER_00 21:55

It's kind of like a cobweb, but like sort of like, but then it goes, you know? It's very powerful. It's the same as He's a God.

SPEAKER_01 22:01

If Hades had dipped his like only the tips of his fingers, like in a little ball of bowl of water and gone and flicked at somebody and they've gone, ah.

SPEAKER_00 22:10

I think on my cheek, it's cold. Yeah, I think it's more like pissed because I think they've all got a disgusted look like there's a smell. He's got a smell for sure. Hades has got a disgusting smell. He smells like dead crows and shit. I just think we all know the underworld to smell. 100%. Um, look, Hades' plan is, I guess, like very similar to Greek mythology, the gods are being tricked and someone's been meddling with stuff. But Hades goes, right, Zeus, here's the deal. I'm gonna release the big squid, or they're gonna kill the princess. Ball's in your court. He goes, It's a good plan. No, it's a great plan. Run it, Hades. And it's crazy. I don't know how he tricked him that well. It seems like Zeus would be on his on his on his tongue.

SPEAKER_01 22:48

Zeus seems like he doesn't give a shit. No. He's he's up there just not caring.

SPEAKER_00 22:52

This whole thing could have happened by the time he looked down. He looks insecure, because I feel like his whole thing, like Hades is like, they're mucking you off down there. They don't think gods are that powerful. We'll show them. I do think the second Hades does all this, the humans should buck up. Yeah. This is crazy that he was like, I I know that's the god, but it's crazy everyone isn't like kill that princess right now. Well, I think that the crow man changes.

SPEAKER_01 23:16

It's a tough thing because I think what's good in the Odyssey is they're saying we're not gonna show you the gods. And so there's still faith that you're meant to have in these gods really existing and doing their things. Yes. But because he's literally come down, he's made a woman age to the point of death in seconds, and said, I'm gonna unleash the kraken unless you kill her.

SPEAKER_00 23:38

Everybody should be like, Well, he's real, and we're gonna kill her as he's just said. A trillion percent. It's a really easy they don't work mysterious ways, it works in very obvious ways. It's funny that the only guy that's on like Haiti size is like a crazy town crier, but it's not weird.

SPEAKER_01 23:52

I named him Russell Brand. Okay, great.

SPEAKER_00 23:54

That's exactly what he is.

SPEAKER_01 23:55

He has a podcast. I hear this. He looks so Russell Brand. Good to know that back in ancient Greek times, they still had that guy on the sidewalk spewing gobbledygook.

SPEAKER_00 24:04

100%. It's the best.

SPEAKER_01 24:05

But this guy knows it's real. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:06

This guy's seen it, and it's like, guys, you could all have seen it too. And no one's on his side. Everyone's like, look, we'll figure let's go trust this guy just rocked up from the the from the water. We saved him from the uh the beach, and he's that guy. We give him 10 days, if not, we kill the princess.

SPEAKER_01 24:21

You sort of think Sam Worthington's gonna like fall in love with the princess or something. Or and that just doesn't happen, which I guess is against stereotype and unpredictable, but it's it's also I don't think it's unpredictable.

SPEAKER_00 24:33

I think they went, oh, we did hoop, we introduced what we've already got Lowe. We introduced a new woman named Lo. So And the audience is gonna love Lo.

SPEAKER_01 24:42

Lo's a big guy. They're gonna go. How are we meant to get everybody to like this woman that we're not really even gonna get to see for the rest of the movie? Oh, so what we're gonna do is we're gonna keep cutting back, and every time we do, she's gonna hand out bread. People people love a bread hand around her.

SPEAKER_00 24:57

It's a good one. It's a good one. It's a soup kitchen with bread. Yeah, it's a bread.

SPEAKER_01 25:01

It's it's really good. She's somebody that cares, she gives out a lot of bread.

SPEAKER_00 25:03

Yeah, it's good stuff. Look, here's our here's our character so far. Essentially, I don't even know who assigns Sam Wormington the job. I don't know who has the credentials to be like, right, you're going on a mission, Sam, and don't worry. You and Lo, we've got a team going. Show them the team. Bunch of riff-raff. Yeah. You know? I would not trust. That's a bad team. Bad team. It's a really bad team. It's almost like they really want Hades to blow up the world. Yeah. I think they're massacres. They're fucked up.

SPEAKER_01 25:27

Not a single likable person on the team. And now I want to get into a big critique on the movie. It has one of the worst sense of humours I've ever seen a major blockbuster have.

SPEAKER_00 25:37

Pretty impressive, isn't it? None of it lands. I think none of it's right. No, none of it's right. I think it's going for not like not lazy Greek like talk, but sort of like a bit hoity. And then sometimes Sam Wirmington will be like, shut up, bitch. Like a family guy, bit. It's really takes you out of the whole thing, you know.

SPEAKER_01 25:58

There's a flute gag where a guy's brought a second flute. It just feels like a weird punch up by an like Patton Oswald give it a script for a day. And he was like, You've already shot it, you can do an insert shot here of a second flute. That could work.

SPEAKER_00 26:12

That could work. When Ralph Fines flies away, we've got a two-flute guy to really punch it up.

SPEAKER_01 26:18

Uh yeah, let's let's I guess in terms of talking about our leads here, let's talk about the actors as well. Um, because also unfortunately, Sam Worthington's doing a terrible performance.

SPEAKER_00 26:28

Sam Wellington's given nothing. And and and the problem, I guess, I'm and it this is the fault of the film and everything, but I was gonna say maybe those Greek gods, you know, the first, you know, this is the first guy. Yeah. So maybe he's a bit bland, you know, he's the first hero. You know, he's sort of like, I'm figuring this whole thing out, but Sam Worthington is playing him so straight and not even heroic. Just sort of really is just sort of going through the emotions and at points, really should die.

SPEAKER_01 26:54

Everyone, I think, in the movie is bad, I think I'd say.

SPEAKER_00 27:00

Which is Mad Mickelson is horrible in it.

SPEAKER_01 27:02

And we know these are all pretty good actors. Yeah. Like the supporting cut, like Sam Worthington, I think, has always struggled sometimes with his acting, but he's churned out some good performances.

SPEAKER_00 27:13

I think he has it's just a big it's just like don't put the whole thing in him. Yeah. And his Australian accent's just screaming.

SPEAKER_01 27:18

Oh, it's so, and I mean he's nobody's even doing anything about him. He's the only Aussie there. It was the same in Troy. Eric Banner's the lead. It's like, fuck, Brad Pitt. What are you gonna do? That horse. Oh man. It's gonna be a sports band. If there's one accent that couldn't be further from working in a Greek setting, it's ours. It's ours.

SPEAKER_00 27:42

Everyone got really pissed off at like, you know, there's no Greek people in the Odyssey, and you know, how dare it's a racist piece of shit. However, an Australian came on screen, but like, alright. Yeah, it's tough. Nolan, you know, get some realism, okay?

SPEAKER_01 27:53

If when when Odysseus walked in, if the witch was like, I'll get you a bunch of koala's out front.

SPEAKER_00 28:01

My sheep, my sheep. That's right, New Zealand. The big puppets Australian are here. He's been a bug. Isn't it crazy? That's a puppet. The whole time I was going, that fucker, how's he done this? What is this? I remember walking up at the screen and being just like, I think that was real. They're like, no, it wasn't a CGI. I'm like, nah, it wasn't right. Some nonsense. I saw the big D see the big puppets. Yeah. Crazy.

SPEAKER_01 28:28

It feels like it's fake marketing for the film. That's how cool the puppet is. I know, right? The person makes me gasp when it came in and it was just grabbed something and went.

SPEAKER_00 28:41

God, it's good. We need to squeeze a more Odyssey chat, but uh God, this clash of Tines is re-screwed.

SPEAKER_01 28:46

Oh, it's it's great to see the two. So I'm only assuming the director's at fault. I don't know if this is like a random studio director.

SPEAKER_00 28:55

He done a couple other things that was like, oh whatever, you know. Yeah, because everything about it is. I will just say, I will say it's very big. Like, there's a lot of scenes with like loads of extras in some of these scenes. And like great, but I'm also like And yet it's not it doesn't feel big.

SPEAKER_01 29:09

It's not shot, I'll tell you something about Troy. Feels massive.

SPEAKER_00 29:12

The guy that's very famous, it's like got like just the whole streets filled with it.

SPEAKER_01 29:17

Oh, they definitely that that is shot as such a big epic. No matter the pitfalls of that movie, it also feels huge. Yeah. So seeing this, uh, and going, I I can see you've got all of the ingredients there, but why have you shot it from this Dutch angle?

SPEAKER_00 29:33

Well it's massive, and then I feel like this band of like this like the horrid team goes to essentially becomes almost like a Robin Hood-esque scene, because now we're just like in a forest at one point.

SPEAKER_01 29:43

Yeah, and it doesn't feel they do just look like guys in costumes in a forest. Yeah. It just doesn't feel like they're blending in with what's there.

SPEAKER_00 29:52

It feels like a great BBC show from the 2006. It looks like Robin Hood from BBC. It looks exactly like Robin Hood from the BBC.

SPEAKER_01 29:58

When I was saying that I thought the movie just felt like scene after scene, I'm I meant the way that every time the next scene there's the solution, it's just set up in the scene before. Yeah. Mads Mickelson goes, Hey, do you know how to fight? No. Teaches him to fight. In the next scene, they verse the scorpions and he can fight. Lo says, Do you know how to defeat Medusa? He goes, No. She says this is how you do it. In the next scene, he defeats Medusa. It's just he's only picking up the information in the scene prior to the execution.

SPEAKER_00 30:25

You're not interested.

SPEAKER_01 30:26

No, there's no stakes.

SPEAKER_00 30:27

No. Like, it's and it's a horrible group of people. Like, we've got 10 days. You're like, where's the passage? I think we see two nights, right? Yeah, it was. I don't feel like there's a countdown. I feel like Ralph goes, right, cracking!

unknown 30:43

Fuck!

SPEAKER_00 30:44

I've got to set a timer. So let's just let's just run this through. How long do we think it's been?

SPEAKER_01 30:48

This guy's gotten pretty crazy over the time that that's he's got about ten days of crazy on him, right?

SPEAKER_00 30:54

Look, so so so we're in the forest. Ralph Fine goes finds a guy, an evil witch guy, and was like, hey, you're So this is the guy.

SPEAKER_01 31:01

The one thing I did like in the movie, I did like the little section that showed Zeus coming down as an eagle, fucking that wife and going away. That was great. That was proper Zeus eagle.

SPEAKER_00 31:11

Yes, 100%. The whole story of uh Sam Wervington's character is that Zeus cucked his enemy. This guy was like screaming at the clouds, and he's like, I'm gonna fuck your wife, which is so god-esque. And I didn't realize that it sort of is the story, but this was like this is funny, and that's hilarious, you know. I wish that guy somehow came back into the story. It's just a very clean- No, but that was the guy. Oh, that's the guy. That's the guy. Oh, gotcha. Is that really who that is? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:40

He gets struck by the lightning and turns into that monster.

SPEAKER_00 31:44

You know what? This is a good film. This is a good film. Immediately back on side. Me being like, I wish he was back in. Yeah. It feels empty though, you know. You get when you get what you want, you actually don't even it's actually a real big life lesson there.

SPEAKER_01 31:55

You just be like, I think this movie actually has just clicked together in a way that's very good.

SPEAKER_00 32:02

Um, so yeah, he just sort of keeps popping back in to give him a little bit of rough housing, you know?

SPEAKER_01 32:08

Yeah, he's he's a weird villain, because he's he then ch he then runs into the scorpions. Then we get the big scorpion scene.

SPEAKER_00 32:16

We've also scorpions go on for ages. I have nothing to say about it. I couldn't believe I went and make a tea, came back, and there was still another six minutes of scorpions. Also, big pet peeve for this villa uh this film. Three villains have this scorpion tail CGI thing as a weapon. And I think that's incredibly cheap and lazy. Because the Medusa has it, the scorpions has it, and then somehow uh the Kraken also has it. I kind of couldn't believe it.

SPEAKER_01 32:42

Yeah, but the the VFX artist nails that look.

SPEAKER_00 32:45

Oh yeah, here's the thing. And they were under the pump, and I'm pretty sure they immediately all got fired after it, but it is good something gotta happen.

SPEAKER_01 32:51

The VFX artist going, I've given them all the same tail. I saved you a million dollars, but they've all got the same tail now? Yep. Yep. Isn't that good? Weren't we not meant to have scorpions in this movie?

SPEAKER_00 33:02

I can just do scorpions. We can just do scorpions. I couldn't, I couldn't, I mean maybe I know it's definitely a Greek mythology thing. But what's our bad I I hope it's a sc I hope big scorpions are a Greek mythology thing. It's crazy for them to go through the whole encyclopedia of all the Greek mythology uh villains and be like, let's just let's just free ball it. I have like a big scorpion be great.

SPEAKER_01 33:31

They're a big part of Greek mythology.

SPEAKER_00 33:32

Okay, great, good for them.

SPEAKER_01 33:34

Uh I like that Zeus keeps on giving Samworthy to gifts, and he's like, nah.

SPEAKER_00 33:38

Nah, I don't fuck you, dad. It's weird his even arc isn't like, you know, like he sort of comes to love his dad as well.

SPEAKER_01 33:45

Yeah. Which is weird.

SPEAKER_00 33:47

So odd.

SPEAKER_01 33:47

He's like, hey, you're pretty cool, but uh I think I'm gonna stay down here. Zeus goes, hell yeah.

SPEAKER_00 33:52

Hell yeah, rip me. Yeah. Now a big part of his film, which I feel like we need to chat about, is the is the wizard desert guy. Sort of elevates the film. Suddenly I feel like I'm in a Star Wars film at the moment.

SPEAKER_01 34:04

Yeah, so he was the one that I thought was Star Treky. Yes. And I was shocked he one stayed around for so long, and he really feels like they found Shabaka.

SPEAKER_00 34:12

It felt Shibaka-esque, and you could really feel the toys flying off the shelf with this guy, you know? I really wanted a plushie of this blue-eyed freak.

SPEAKER_01 34:22

Yeah. You know. He also looked like everything else from the early like 2010s in design. He looked like the weird monsters in like the first Avengers movie. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 34:34

He looked he just looked like every random design. What's that? It's Ultron, that sort of meshing of metals. However, he had the sort of the silhouette of the the the racist ones from Star Wars Phantom Menace were discussing trade ago. He had that shape, but Ultron's mesh and blue eyes. And he's a kind of our hero. Dare I say the real hero.

SPEAKER_01 34:57

He gets far too much to do.

SPEAKER_00 35:00

Like he gets a lot to do in the film. And I couldn't believe it.

SPEAKER_01 35:05

Near as much screen time as Sam Worthington once introduced.

SPEAKER_00 35:08

Stan Worthington, Lowe, and then this guy. And then we got a band of, dare I say, some of the best character actors of this generation doing nothing in the background.

SPEAKER_01 35:20

Mads Mickelson has nothing to do with this film. Nothing. He even sacrifices himself for no reason. Even this guy gets a bigger moment of sacrificing himself than Mads Mickelson.

SPEAKER_00 35:32

The guy from Game of Thrones who's kind of their leader. Thrown to the side, barely anything. Let's talk about the longer coin. The coin? The coin?

SPEAKER_01 35:40

No. Oh, sorry. Sam Worthington's hand. Did you notice that? Which one? It's just a log slow-motion scene of him going. Oh, sorry, when he gets like stung on a scorpion. Yes, yes. And they go, We're gonna sit on the pain in his face for a while. And his face is just sort of the equivalent of when you do a colon and an O on a keyboard.

SPEAKER_00 36:06

It's I feel like it's healed pretty quickly as well. I feel the the the Jedi guy's like, don't worry, that's a classic scorpion thing. I'll just touch you and then it's gone. Oh don't worry, I have blue. Yeah. My blue will help. I'll sneeze on you. In my culture, that's a very nice thing to do.

SPEAKER_01 36:24

Couldn't help but notice no one blessed me. Which in my culture is a no-down. I'm means the sneezes acid now. So someone could someone could bless Sam Wormington's face, then go to another oath.

SPEAKER_00 36:38

God, he's so silently screaming. But yeah, you are right. In Phantasm, I was like, let's skip to the Hades, but then yeah, I don't know what. I feel like these guys are in the desert and then they just magically transform to the entrance of hell.

SPEAKER_01 36:50

Well, they just they ride on the scorpions for a while and they go to the witches. Yeah. And then I always love the witches.

SPEAKER_00 36:56

The witches were a big part of Hercules, and so I think the Grey Sisters, the three sisters, they're just OG, they're good stuff. They're great, they're such good. Fantastic makeup, only set back by the fact they've done for some reason shot Nike. Shot with Ikea's lighting. I don't know why they've done it. And they're a bit then, they're creepy. Again, not that much, they really just get them pretty quickly.

SPEAKER_01 37:20

They've also just sort of cast, I think, nobodies to play them. I think you you know you cast some fun actors to try and yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:27

Okay, they they blew their budget on a lot of other people. I don't think they're like, we got the makeup, we're not doing funny voices.

SPEAKER_01 37:32

Well, they clearly were like, You'll be in makeup for like 12 hours, and a legitimate actor went, I'm not doing that. We haven't seen the penguin, Colin Colin Pharrell. Made Jim Carrey go insane. No, I'm not doing it.

SPEAKER_00 37:47

You don't even see their faces well. You kind of want a little something something. Yeah. Um, but they're fun. They're probably my favorite part of the film.

SPEAKER_01 37:53

Uh yeah, it's a shame. Again, it's it's not much. I think the big moments in the movie to me, which are Medusa, the Witches, the Kraken, uh Pegasus, the things that I truly really loved about the original or love about Greek mythology, aren't really given grand moments to shine or feel like uh like something big is happening. Like, one of the best things about the Odyssey is that when things happen, it feels huge. It feels like there's a lot of weight, it feels really frightening. There's a lot of horror in the Odyssey.

SPEAKER_00 38:28

Oh my god. Can I can I like I've I need uh one, I watched it in the standard definition. So killing Yeah, you watch it, you watch it in uh 480p. 480p on the back of a bus. Um so I need to see it, so my rating will probably get higher. But that scene with the pigs, yeah, that is by far my favorite scene like in like all Christopher Nolan films. That is disgusting. I think it's all makeup. The fact that someone's shoving their hands like using like pottery, that is horrifying.

SPEAKER_01 39:01

I didn't realize he had it in him to make a sequence of that.

SPEAKER_00 39:04

I just think it's the like I feel like he's been so so like realistic for so long. And that's not a bad thing. That's his style, that's his films, but that was fucking horrifying. And I was like, yes, that is so left of field of you, fantastic. Cool way to depict a witch as well.

SPEAKER_01 39:23

I just think it's it's really That's my thought, like just but I also think it's really working because I think he's approaching that with realism. He's saying, What's the most hands-on way a witch could transform someone so that I can maintain like I think the best thing about the Odyssey is that it's actually his approach to it's really simple, and so it just really works.

SPEAKER_00 39:44

He's going, I'm just gonna make it really simple, and then it will just sit in those moments, and that'll be and again, I think the limitations are most of the time it's just them rocking up to an island, shit gets fucked, and then jump back on the island. Yeah, so it's first it's just like, all right, we got seven islands, let's just do it fully, you know.

SPEAKER_01 40:01

Yes, absolutely. Let's just do it. And I think he also really and now we're just sort of talking about the Odyssey. But I saw people being like, Oh, I hate that Nolan did his usual, chop it up, have multiple timelines. And I'm like, if that movie is just running linear, it is just island after island after island after island. Because he's setting the narrative on an island he's already at, which is the most boring one with Calypso, uh, which has always been, I thought, the weakest part of the Odyssey. Then I like that he cut that he was actually just kind of fucking her.

SPEAKER_00 40:31

I love that like he was like, that doesn't sell there's little bits in the Odyssey which I do love because he's like, I can't really get rid of that, but it is wrong for his character. The fact Matt Damon's just like, oh shoot, the Cyclops is so great. Like his arcs immediately, like, should have done that. That's on me.

unknown 40:47

Whoops.

SPEAKER_00 40:47

It's crazy his guys don't just be like, I'd be pissed.

SPEAKER_01 40:51

Well, I think he's still got he's kept like the hubris, I think, of the character still, which is good. Yeah, I did love my favorite part in the in the movie is I don't think Matt Damon's great in the moment where he rocks up to those guys eating in the ground, and he's like, What'd you think if you ate quietly, the gods wouldn't notice? Just and storms off so annoying. He's like, You killed yourselves.

SPEAKER_00 41:09

The guy from yesterday is like, oh, just so fucking ugly. He's great as well. He's also good, yeah. It's yeah, god, it's good. He's an East Enders. I didn't realise that. I think Christopher.

SPEAKER_01 41:19

Did he actually get his role from East Enders? Yeah, really.

SPEAKER_00 41:21

I think he uh so I think he ended in 2016, and then I don't know when was yesterday was maybe 2018, 2019. Something, but just yeah, good for him, right? And then Christinore was like, You're great, you're gonna be in a few months.

SPEAKER_01 41:32

Well, it's crazy he got um yesterday. Like to get the lead in a Danny Boyle movie, just sort of off of the back of that, I guess. I'm not sure. Because he also sings really well in yesterday. How do I sing? Oh, of course, I guess. Yeah, um because he's really good. And then he's just randomly in tenant. He's got nothing to fucking do in tenant.

SPEAKER_00 41:51

Is he the like oh no, he's not like the the czar. I feel like there's a oh no, who's the person there's someone like explained to some uh to um he's he's the protagonist is like uh is he like the oracle?

SPEAKER_01 42:06

No, I don't think he's his main role is the fact that for all their plans to happen, Nolan clearly couldn't work out a way for there to not be another person helping. And so he's just the fourth guy that helps. Yeah. So it's John David Washington and then Robert Patterson and then Aaron Taylor Jordan. Aaron Taylor Johnson, and then way down in a much smaller role, is like, well, somebody needs to be driving the boat in that state. I'm doing the ad.

SPEAKER_00 42:32

You know, I'm doing the petty cash in backwards. Oh my god, all these numbers, but they'll come back, I'll make it'll make sense. It'll make sense, and you buy things. The end of this receipt is the beginning.

SPEAKER_01 42:45

The barcode, where does it end and start? It's just lines. The end of tenant is unfortunately a huge tax bill. And with his arms crossed going, it'll come back. It always comes back. This is gonna pay. When you get to the end of your timeline, the tax, the tax credit you're gonna get, it's gonna fucking it's gonna be huge. Anyway, the guy from EastEnders nailed that role and thus earned his place in the Odyssey.

SPEAKER_00 43:17

Um, they get to Medusa, a band of freaks. Now, I've always loved Medusa. You're big Medusa head, big Medusa head, and I'm not talking Medusa's head. There's a bit classic stuff there. It's why you listen. It's real good. It's real good. I I love Percy Jackson, even though it's a bad film, it using an iPod touch. I think that's iconic. I do think that's iconic. It's a bad film. It is the modern day shield. That's what many people are saying, you know? That's freaking iPhone, huh? Um look. I like the big coin in 3D. How was that for you as a child? Was that impressive? I so I distinctly remember uh as a kid after watching.

SPEAKER_01 44:00

Avatar being blown away by the 3D. We dro we drove up and saw it in IMAX in Sydney. Yeah. And I just couldn't believe how good the 3D was. I then don't think I ever saw a good 3D movie again. I remember I paid extra for the 3D in Alice in Wonderland. I paid the extra for the 3D. I remember I paid it for um Monsters versus Aliens. I paid it for this. None of it was ever good. I think the only other one I thought was genuinely quite good in 3D was I think Toy Story 3 was. There was an anime or How to Train Your Dragon. Oh. That was the other one that I saw. And I was like, wow, that was really good. That was the first time. I was like, that's all so good. It's crazy. But that was it. Nobody else ever fucking did anything with it. I think maybe like Hugo had some depth, but at what was the point?

SPEAKER_00 44:49

Hugo's like, imagine a train station zoomed in. Mark was says he being like 3D. It's like, that's the wrong guy to get involved in it.

SPEAKER_01 44:57

It was like in the classical sense. Yeah. He was like Sethabun Curren's moustaches in 3D. It's a butterflies in 3D. Glowing Ghostbirds in 2D. It's a great 3D experience. It's your ghost 2D.

SPEAKER_00 45:08

What do you mean a more iconic voice thank you? A snoochy librarian, it seems. The book's called How to Paint Houses, but I've called it the Irishman. Anyway, our band of brothers get to Medusa's lair. I couldn't believe how fucked up they get. Every one of them dies!

SPEAKER_01 45:39

What the fuck? His speech seconds beforehand being like your family to me. Knowing that they're all massacred.

SPEAKER_00 45:48

Like he's like Star Fucker NRL. Like he's like, boys, scrummin in. This is gonna be good. Yeah. And Baker absolutely fried. I couldn't believe it. Immediately, Game of Thrones thrown off a balcony, Mad Mickelson stoned, Aaron Taylor Johnson, and me like, oh no, oh god, bam.

SPEAKER_01 46:07

Well, I was so deeply frustrated, and I wonder if you were the same, because they all kept on being like, look down, and then they'd look up wide-eyed.

SPEAKER_00 46:16

At one point, Sam Wilmington's running away from Deusa and then looks back. I don't know why they kept that taken. Did she still follow me? I was not gonna look at it.

SPEAKER_01 46:24

One of them go to close the at one stage Nicholas Hall goes, keep your eyes down, keep your eyes down, keep your eyes down. Ah, rats why'd I look up? That's crazy. She didn't even have to like flick her tail. When you can because it takes a moment for her power to work in the film as depicted. Close your eyes. It's like the it's like she can go through your closed eyes, but she can't, right?

SPEAKER_00 46:46

Yeah. I think that the the thing with like close your eyes and then the tail is essentially for you to knock yourself up and then you're like, where am I? Right, yeah, get distorted.

SPEAKER_01 46:55

Or she can just curl you up and bring you to her face. You know, but it that dynamic never really happens through. It's and it's people fall in lava. I couldn't believe how people fell in the lava. That's what I everyone just kept falling. Even after this sequence, the big monster guy gets killed, falls off a cliff.

SPEAKER_00 47:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 47:12

It's like they didn't want anyone to die in frame, which is an odd, odd directing choice.

SPEAKER_00 47:16

It's very cheap. You wouldn't believe how much lava drives. This guy will fall out of frame. I think Mario always falls in lava. It's off screen, it's very cheap. Nintendo aren't made of money here now. Now why does why can't Perseus get to the Rainbow Road? Oh my god, you wish you fucking wish. Um he cuts off Medusa's head. She's she's she's I thought she looked a bit like Taylor Swift, and that's not a mean thing. I'm not saying like she looks like uh like a snake lady. Yeah. I'm saying just the the the character model of the face look like Taylor Swift.

SPEAKER_01 47:45

Yeah, it sort of had the yeah. Yeah, I can I can say that.

SPEAKER_00 47:47

Sort of a 1989 Taylor Swift, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 47:49

I say, well they've all I've got it to there's very there's very few women in the movie, uh, and this director has made them all look about as the same as possible. And so they're probably just based off that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:01

Feels a bit that feels a bit that feels a bit that. Yeah. Uh they've got the head. Great stuff. Lowe's out there, like, hey, Sam Wormington. I know literally everyone died, but don't worry, you and me, buddy, and then bam! Stabbed in the back of the head. Um, by our guy, the the the the the Zeus cuck.

SPEAKER_01 48:17

Yeah. Now she's got the power of eternity. Precisely. And so I was a bit confused as to why anybody cares that she's dying here.

SPEAKER_00 48:25

I don't really get it. She I think it's just old age. I think a sword cuts that in half. Unless maybe she doesn't. Because I feel like she's comes back at the end. I think someone brings her back though. But I can't understand why she. I don't know if God needs to kind of pick her up.

SPEAKER_01 48:38

I thought they couldn't heal people But she goes, I've been cursed with eternal life. And she goes, That's a curse worse than death. And then in this film dies.

SPEAKER_00 48:47

Yeah. So I would love eternal life if I could just kill myself. That seems like the You haven't got a problem if you can just always just butt little bullet in the head. Exactly. You know? Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 48:57

Not starve yourself. You're fine. Yeah, you're fine. I know. And it's weird too if she's always craved death to in this moment not be going. Oh thank God.

SPEAKER_00 49:05

Like this feels that time.

SPEAKER_01 49:06

Yeah, to just be like, don't, don't be upset for me. I finally get to go away. She must have been shitty when she got back. Aw, Sam Well. And with Sam, that was the fucking I like the other guys, but they're dead, right? She's like, I fell in love with so many other people. Is desert wizard still around? No. Fell in love. The blue one that blew up. The one whose heart goes crazy, he gets a big moment where he's like, you didn't realize my heart was a bomb.

SPEAKER_00 49:33

He blow he terror he terrors at her. I couldn't believe it.

SPEAKER_01 49:38

But he's a hero.

SPEAKER_00 49:40

He's the best guy.

SPEAKER_01 49:41

He is a Swiss army knife of a plot device and a character. They're like, we need a bomb in the scene. Should we give him a voice or a character?

SPEAKER_00 49:48

No. He's a tool.

SPEAKER_01 49:49

But by the time he finishes Chewbacca ring, he speaks in English. Yeah. Oi, mate. Are you doing Medusa? Didn't bet you didn't disbut this one. We got David Wenham as blue heart man.

SPEAKER_00 50:03

Um, again, I feel like they get out of the cave. Sam Welvin goes, Well, a day well served. Let's go back to the He's got the sack over his back and he goes, Come on, low, let's get out of here. I feel like they fly a Pegasus just like as a bus. Like it's not even like a like off into the sunset. It's like we just have to get to A to B. Yeah. We've got a flying horse. Yeah. So we'll just go over there. It's just hanging about. We'll just call it down. It takes opal. Now, now I did not realise this, and I I it kind of all came back to me. But uh Hades uh Ralph Vines is like, hey, Liam Neeson, we should probably, you know, you know, the Kraken. And then Liam Neeson says the camera released the Kraken. I've completely forgot this uh this cultural moment uh that annoying people post about it for about I'd say like just uh pre-2011-2010. This was an annoying thing.

SPEAKER_01 50:55

This was definitely in stuff, yeah. That frame of him on a meme. Yeah, that white fucking text.

SPEAKER_00 51:01

You're gonna see it posted on forums on Reddit, just annoying.

SPEAKER_01 51:04

It was huge, it was huge for so long. Yeah, sort of the Rick roll that year.

SPEAKER_00 51:08

Yeah, pretty much. God, they lasted long back then. Now I'm just fucking seconds.

SPEAKER_01 51:13

It's so quick. So quick. By the time by the time we could make a joke about all of the podcasts, people are always like, We're out of date! Kill yourself. It's like, oh man, can't I'm curse with eternity.

SPEAKER_00 51:24

Um it's not that grand. I don't know why I guess I guess half a billion dollars everyone saw this and it was a cultural moment. Um it's a tough line to squeeze into everything.

SPEAKER_01 51:37

It was also funny too, because they then spent far too long getting their shit together on a sequel, so that by the time that one came out, no one cared. Yeah. How much did uh clash? I think that I think Wrath made around 300. Oh god. So not like a bomb, but I think they spent a fair bit of money on it. Made $302 million.

unknown 51:57

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 51:58

Um, so and had a budget of $150 million.

SPEAKER_00 52:00

I get why studio executives must be just like, fuck, we used to have it so easy.

SPEAKER_01 52:05

Oh, they're like, we didn't used to try. What do you mean you're not watching the new Supergirl? They must be so annoyed. So annoyed. What do you mean you're not watching Masters of the Universe?

SPEAKER_00 52:14

I gotta think of things, you piece of shit. This was not that hard ten years ago.

SPEAKER_01 52:18

Went backrooms and obsession of the Odyssey all making money. All those people tried hard on them.

SPEAKER_00 52:23

You're scum.

SPEAKER_01 52:24

Fuck you guys. Oh, active marketing campaigns to try and get people off the couch and into the cinema?

unknown 52:30

Fuck.

SPEAKER_00 52:31

It really is a funny thing of like if you want to go to cinema now, you've really gotta nail it. Now it's just that it's like, is it on Netflix? You're like, yeah, I'll be on Netflix soon.

SPEAKER_01 52:39

They're like how much did Nolan spend on the puppet and the Odyssey? 20 million just on the puppet?

unknown 52:45

Fuck.

SPEAKER_00 52:46

That's like where do we get a big puppet guy? I don't have a big puppet guy. That's what we paid for the rocks roll in Moana. Oh, it was like a third of that. That was like his gym, his private gym cost that much. Carl, I I really want to give it a bit more as juzge, but I feel like Sam Wilmington goes to the crack and goes, look at this. Bit of a whimper. Look at this. Bit of a whimper. Nah, you got me there. And then Hades goes, nah, you next time. And then Zeus goes, that's my son. And I feel like the film ends.

SPEAKER_01 53:13

Yeah, it really wraps up quick. Yeah. It's almost like they were running out of budget as it was sort of folding.

SPEAKER_00 53:18

Yeah, it's like we can we can animate the Kraken's head and the scorpion tails. So what do you want to do with that?

SPEAKER_01 53:23

And I can everybody that dies falls off a cliff. Yeah. Great, that's a film. That's a film. Oh my god, that's essentially that's essentially a 2010's three-act structure. That's basically all you need. Surely we get pretty good returns. Oh my god, this is what the opening paragraph of Save the Cat was about. Threw away the book. Carl, who would watch Clash of the Titans? I think if you are like me and you desperately want to go back and see the Odyssey at IMAX, and you're like a junkie clawing at your skin, and then it's booked out until the 20th of August in Sydney.

SPEAKER_00 54:05

I gotta tell you, Carl, like I I'm glad I watched the film because I'm just I want to be in the with this, but but my 10am session with five other people in a standard definition cinema did not hit. But everyone was like, it's a loud film, like, was it pretty pretty pet like tepid.

SPEAKER_01 54:24

Pretty tepid. I had when the Cyclops yelled, I had to block my ears in the IMAX because it was one terrifying and shook the scene.

SPEAKER_00 54:32

I had a big old timey horn, I had to listen to that. I'm like, what did that one-eyed fella say? Couldn't hear him. Um who would watch this guy is? Yeah, let's just talk about the Odyssey a bit.

SPEAKER_01 54:42

Yeah, look, so I'm just clawing to get back, and so I've just been in a state of consuming YouTube videos about Greek mythology, watching Troy, then watching this, and then I'm probably gonna go back and watch the original Jason and the Argonauts, because that fucking desperate. Yeah, it's it's it's an itch like no other. Ralph Fines is also in a movie that came out like last year that's only about the ending of the Odyssey. Just the ending? It's just about the massacre at the end. Gotcha, I was gonna say. And so um apparently it's not good, but I'm close to watching that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 55:13

I love all the infographics. Everyone's like, here's how you can watch the rest of the Odyssey. Everyone's like, guys, there really hasn't been that we've been again, it's a pretty uh Would you watch rewatch O Brother Where Art Thou? Come on, come.

SPEAKER_01 55:24

Well that's it's got come on a lot of folk singing.

SPEAKER_00 55:28

And that's the best part.

SPEAKER_01 55:29

That's the best part. There's metaphors. I don't think I've I would look, I'd love to give it a rewatch. I remember hating that movie, but now maybe I might like it.

SPEAKER_00 55:37

Maybe I feel like if you you going in knowing it's a lot of folks on I I love the Yodelin, and quite frankly, I like the story of the Odyssey, so it's pretty good stuff.

SPEAKER_01 55:45

Yeah, no. I'm not come on. I'll probably watch it. I'll watch it. It's just remember you've got to remember, I've got a whole thing against the Coens and their comedies. It's just when you when you only get to see the lady killers and and cruel like I've just seen so many of their bad ones. Have you seen Raising Arizona? Yeah, so I've watched some of the better ones now. I w obviously the Big Lebowski I finally got around to and being like, well, that's a five-star film. That's it's very funny. I get it, that's very funny. It's tough to understand how those guys made lady killers, though.

SPEAKER_00 56:18

I don't know what that was. There's another George Clooney one that I need to watch with uh intolerable cruelty, and I've seen that. That's horrible. It's crazy.

SPEAKER_01 56:26

Yeah, I can it's I've seen those two, you know. Like I think them trying to sell burn after reading as a laugh out loud comedy was dumb marketing. That's tough. That's tough.

SPEAKER_00 56:34

Um I was gonna say that Brad Pitts moment in the in the closet does hit. It does hit, but it's a very good moment. But there's a hundred minutes, and I was some funny moments, but more of like a it's yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_01 56:44

It's like an adogo, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. And then yeah, like Hail Caesar, which again also has funny moments, but I think is like Hail Caesar, yeah. Not as strong as it's past.

SPEAKER_00 56:54

I like Hail Caesar, but I know what Hail Caesar is.

SPEAKER_01 56:56

Hail Caesar's actually because that's such a like a disconjoined movie. That's almost a perfect one to just watch your favourite scenes on YouTube. Because there are like seven awesome scenes in that movie, and then just like a bunch of fluff, just a bunch of inconsequential fluff.

SPEAKER_00 57:11

I think they're just they're just like, remember this time.

SPEAKER_01 57:13

Oh, I hate that people get to a stage where they're like, I love old Hollywood.

SPEAKER_00 57:17

It's like I wasn't there, so I'd have to do that. And it doesn't look that good. I guess now we're gonna get like, I don't know, I guess Clash of the Titans, like the behind the scenes, and that's a whole film. Gotta be good. Have you seen Under the Silver Lake? No, I need to see that. Is that one with um oh Andrew Garfield? Yeah, yeah, no, I need to see that.

SPEAKER_01 57:35

But it is, it's a um like a private eye, that's sort of a a movie done in the style of romanticizing today's LA, and it's so such a clever way to look at LA. Like it's just that it's romanticizing, and then in amongst it all is like stabbings, druggies on the street, great, sweltering heat, and but it's just shot with such a loving intent, and yet you go, What a horrible city. Uh I watched that recently and I thought that was like awesome. I thought that was like that blew me away. Nice. Uh that should be a big cold hit. Sort of it was sort of like I think that's that was very much loved. I think it's definitely getting there. Yeah. It's very like Maholland Drivey. I think is like very, very like sort of just sleepy, taking its own time to get places, never really in a rush, but like really good, and and Andrew Garfield's excellent. Yeah, nice. God, it's just tough to really commit to talking about Clash of the Titans.

SPEAKER_00 58:28

I don't want to, Carl. You're you're uh we're given the Odyssey, you know? Yeah. Carl, that kind of was Clash of the Titans.

SPEAKER_01 58:36

I feel like uh Don't worry, we'll make it up with Raf next year.

SPEAKER_00 58:40

Raf will be a real I'll take real notes. It'll be good stuff, Carl.

SPEAKER_01 58:44

I took it was a struggle to take notes. Did you miss any of your notes? All my notes are all of my notes really felt like, and then this happens, and then this happens.

SPEAKER_00 58:53

I try to get like something like of of merit to read talk about. Um it really is very surface level, it's kind of impressive. Yeah. Mads Mickelson's called Draco.

SPEAKER_01 59:04

I thought it was crazy that those two people that go at the beginning of the movie, we're gonna come, and then they're there, and then at the end they go, we're on a scorpion now, and then we never see them again. And they're the ones from his party that live. Yeah. If you like those sorts of side characters, this is for you.

SPEAKER_00 59:22

And I think they're the only ones that weren't kind of established actors, I kind of couldn't believe it.

SPEAKER_01 59:26

Yeah. I the other shame is I have a I could be wrong with this, but I have a real vivid memory in my head from the original Clash of the Titans, which is the it's depicted that the gods have all of the humans as little clay figures, and that's how they play with them, and they move around.

SPEAKER_00 59:42

They did, they did have that for a hot second.

SPEAKER_01 59:43

So that they have a little bit of it here. Yeah. And I wish that they had either dialed that up to like a huge amount now that they've got a big budget, or just depicts their control in a different, more ethereal way.

SPEAKER_00 59:57

I felt like Leonison was like, what the fuck are these little soldiers? I'm gonna step around them. Anyway, I've got a weird thing to say. You're like, uh You did the worst of everything, really. For you. Carl, it's a great film. Check it out. Great mythology.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:10

And a big shout out to was it Luke Evans was Apollo?

SPEAKER_00 1:00:13

Luke Evans was Apollo. Um, no idea why. Uh, good for Luke Evans. It's a big gap. Crazy wig. Big crazy wig.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:22

None of those gods look right now. The scene with all of the gods standing about looked like the equivalent of uh that Jennifer Lopez movie with all of the influences standing there.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:33

It kind of was like they were standing up in the middle of like a tel like an optus store. Very white and stuff.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:38

It was very, it was very optusy. Yeah. Yeah, crazy an ASOP. They could have at least stood in an ASOP, you know. A little bit of texture.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:49

Thanks for listening.